Serabut.

yup... a new day and it's getting worst.. It's been 7 days since last time i smoke.. i never thought of quitting actually.. just suddenly i think to do it.. maybe to appreciate a new lease of life recently but now i don't know whether i can carry on or not..

i'm completely stressed out.. sad.. heart broken.. i made a person that i love hated me.. i'm completely down.. no mood to do anything.. been having this thought of ending my life.. yea.. i know.. it's not a way to settle all of your problems but that was what on my mind.. i'm not that crazy to do it but i guess everyone must have thought about it sometimes.. *sigh*

I should start to smoke again.. that's the only cure for me right now.. but will it be worth it..?? *sigh* God please help me.. i'm drowning in sorrow... all i'm asking for right now is for her to say something to me.. please dear.. no more silent treatment.. it's killing me... I am deeply sorry... what more can i do to make things better... i really really love you so much...

*sigh*